All-TigerNet [13105]
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Joined: 11/5/01
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I feel as though I owe each of you an explanation....
Apr 22, 2024, 12:59 PM
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Wish I could have made it shorter, but I just couldn't. Grammar police, I confess guilt.
Back around August through October last year, I started noticing some weakness in my arms while doing odd jobs around the house. I just thought it was old age continuing to creep on me, so I increased my upper body exercises, and became more active.
On October 27th, I awoke with my left arm and hand asleep (or so I thought). As the day progressed, I couldn’t get the arm or hand to work correctly. After a few days of trying to convince my wife, “It will work itself out”, I ended up at the Pardee Hospital ER. By then, I was in pain throughout my body, and my right arm and hand were beginning to “lock up” on me. The ER doctor informed me on the spot, I had all the signs of a compressed spinal cord. I was forwarded to a cervical specialist.
After weeks of trying to obtain an MRI, I finally receive one on December 21st. On Christmas Eve, I receive a call from my surgeon. He wants to operate, immediately. Three days later, I’m in surgery for a collapsed C3/4 vertebrae, which has pinched my spinal cord down to the size of string. By surgery date, I have no use of the left arm and hand, about 10-20% use of the right arm and hand, my legs barely work, my body hurts, including burning and stinging skin.
The first day I remember following surgery was 5 days later. My wife temporarily left me alone, and I decide to go to the bathroom. I made it a few steps before my legs collapse under me. I fall against a wall and into the floor. I lose all motor control. My arms and legs started violently shaking. I’ve voided myself, and I’m lying there thinking, “This is it for me. I’m not going to make it.” I’m trying to call for out for my wife, but my voice isn’t working either.
I’m now waiting to die, and everything has become quiet and peaceful. Suddenly, I hear a loud coach’s whistle blow. Then, I hear my Dad’s voice as clear as if he was standing beside me. “Get your ### up off the ground! You hear me? Get up now!” I briefly think I’m back on a high school football practice field.
Next, it’s my departed son’s voice, calm and reassuring. “Dad, it’s not your time yet. It’s important for you to stand up now. You can do this.”
At this point, I actually laugh and respond, “Ok, ok, give me a minute. I’m hurting real bad.”
As I reach for the wall and a nearby door knob, I notice I have regained enough motor control to pull myself to a standing position. I hear Dad’s whistle blow again, and Dad yells out, “Alright, let’s run it again! Next play!”
Holding onto the wall, and I yell out “Help! Somebody help me!” My wife comes running, unaware that I had just become aware, and shocked that I had attempted to move on my own. I literally had to later explain to her, I had no recall of anything prior to surgery, up until several minutes earlier. In turn, she had to explain everything going on with me.
I could still walk, but only with assistance, and only a few steps at a time. The legs had become worse since surgery. Other issues had also worsened, but this is what I want YOU to understand. Later that afternoon, my wife helped me sit down in front of my computer. She put my right hand on the mouse. “Can you work the mouse?” she asked. I remember responding, “Yes, I can press it with my index finger.” She comes right back, “Then you can surf the internet.”
I found my way to Tnet, and for weeks, I sat there reading your interactions in depth. Escapism at its best, I would start forgetting about my own pain. The few posts you see from me in January through mid-March, my wife typed for me. The old NASCAR video about Cale’s Daytona win, I had saved years ago, but my wife posted it. I dictated the message.
At this point, I have now gone through at least 25 episodes, where I unexpectedly lose motor control of my body. They are much easier to handle if you know what to expect. I've taken almost no pain meds, because they are ineffective against the nerve damage.
What began as a terrifying ordeal, has now morphed into a highly spiritual and life altering experience. My wife is a saint. I am convinced my Dad and Son are eternally together (revealed to me more than once). And you people, I know for a fact some of you were curious/concerned about my condition; but I couldn’t explain any of it, until I sorted it out myself. Still, you continued to show immense kindness and compassion based on my lone “nerve damage” comments.
Every single day, I sat here clicking the mouse and testing my fingers on the keyboard. As we moved through March, I started to notice I could type some with my right hand. As we moved into April, I started using the left hand some on the keyboard. I told my PT Staff what I was doing, and they encouraged me to keep working the keyboard. I started trying to post by myself, forcing my fingers to type, regardless how slow. Your comments and thumbs up kept me going.
Finally, within the past 2 weeks, I have made a breakthrough. I just typed this diatribe in its entirety. I can now walk, with assistance, for 30 minutes. The skin still burns and stings, but doc tells me its just the nerves waking back up, testing themselves, and relearning. The loss of motor control is now just an arm or leg in lieu of the entire body. Doc has made it clear. I have 8-9 months of recovery to go, but he says I’m working so hard at it, he expects close to a full recovery.
So listen up Crump and B-Miest, these men and women just did something you couldn’t get me to do for years, re-up my Tigernet membership. Thankfully for you guys, I’ll never post as frequently as I once did years ago, but I’ll be here every single day. So, if you want to shoot the bull with a true bull*******, drop me a line. If you need somebody to listen, drop me a line. I love life, and I love people’s life stories. I’m available.
And one final time, a sincere thanks for lifting me up and carrying me forward. The prayers, thoughts, and grace will never be forgotten. You are my people, regardless.
Go Tigers!!!
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