Replies: 75
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1st Rounder [643]
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Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 2:34 PM
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There once was a kid named Jalen Who thought he was in for smooth sailin' But when Clemson came calling His stats turned appalling And by the end of the game he was ailin'!
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Oculus Spirit [94405]
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Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..
Jan 3, 2017, 2:50 PM
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for Sarkisian?
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..
Jan 3, 2017, 2:56 PM
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I don't like to use the term queer But something is odd around here When Lane got kicked out Sark declared with a shout, "I'll coach for a bucket of beer!"
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All-In [40987]
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Roses are Red and Violets are Blue
Jan 3, 2017, 2:59 PM
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Sark likes beer
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Orange Blooded [2694]
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...and I do as well***
Jan 3, 2017, 3:10 PM
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Oculus Spirit [94405]
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That's not a friggin limerick.
Jan 7, 2017, 10:01 AM
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But I TUed it cause it was funny. I?beer2
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Orange Blooded [4789]
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1st Rounder [643]
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Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..
Jan 3, 2017, 9:51 PM
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Just who won the divorce isn't clear It left them both drenched in their tears For Kiff things look stark And Nik's stuck with Sark But Sark's got a bucket of beer!
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Athletic Dir [858]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 2:54 PM
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There once was a man named Kiffin He left town before the @$$ kickin...
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 3:48 PM
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"Look out! It's the Pachyderm Squad! Nick Saban's part human, part god!" These Tigers ain't skeered - Nick's cranky and weird. We'll own that new green Tampa sod.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 3:51 PM
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Our D front dismantled the Nuts. Again, with no ifs, ands, or buts, They're gonna do fine With Hurts and his line - They know how to bring their own guts.
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Legend [17800]
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good***
Jan 5, 2017, 9:31 AM
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 6:09 PM
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I can't, for the life of me, choose Which ones of my or'nge pairs of shoes I'm wearing on Monday - The glorious one day This season when Bama will lose!
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 7:15 PM
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"Got some bucknuts I can borrow?" Is what Wilkins will say to Bo Scarbrough. "It's called stop and frisk Come at your own risk And expect to be quite sore tomorrow!"
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 7:37 PM
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I'm thinkin' without Mr. Kiffin Ol' Saban's O line might be whiffin'. Won't know what to do When Clelin busts through, Then Hurts will be cryin' and sniffin'.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 9:04 PM
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Reuben & Jalen & Bo Deserve some respectin', although Like buses left Lane, They're missing this train - Straight to the champ platform 'twill go!
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Hall of Famer [23122]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 9:14 PM
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There once was a player named Djitte Whose playing was not very pretty He missed the tip in And inch from the rim Why must he play so sh.tty?
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110%er [5123]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 9:39 PM
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I once herd a chikin a cluckin' - his own team was surely a sukin' "the Tater's will get beat... the SEC will get meat" regardless of their recent pluckin'
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 9:46 PM
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The Clemson fans don't need to worry. Our all-time best gridiron story Is gonna be written When Bama gets bitten. Deshaun will conclude it with glory!
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All-In [27366]
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There once was a team called "The Tide"
Jan 3, 2017, 9:52 PM
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Whose coach was so cranky and snide. He flew to Tampa to win But left with chagrin Because his miraculous luck finally died.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 9:52 PM
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Vicarious bandwagon Coots, Whose fan base for Crimson Tide roots, Might wanna dial back, Since Clemson will whack The Elephants right out their boots.
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All-TigerNet [10572]
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Jack and Jill went up the hill
Jan 3, 2017, 9:55 PM
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They each had a quarter Jill came down with fifty cents Did jack go up for water?
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110%er [5123]
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^^^missed limeric lessons.***
Jan 3, 2017, 9:59 PM
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 9:58 PM
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Ol' Sark's pile of empties is high, And Kiffin was glad to say 'bye'. The only thing missing Is Saban's boo-hissing When he gets force-fed humble pie.
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All-In [27366]
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The Tide came to Tampa to win,
Jan 3, 2017, 10:00 PM
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Coached by their leprechaun's twin; But Dabo and team, Alabama did cream, 'Cause Saban's sinister luck finally died.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 10:07 PM
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Come Monday night I'll be thrilled When the elephant herd has been killed With tide fans a'dyin' And Saban a'cryin' And Sark passed out drunk on the field!
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All-In [27366]
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Clemson Tigers 'round the world will delight,
Jan 3, 2017, 10:11 PM
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As Bama goes down Monday night. Deshaun wins the game, Making Bama look lame, And causing Cootville once more to ignite.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 10:11 PM
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Right by Walmart's Cheetos and pleather, Some Bama fans might get together. But mullets, Newports, Wife-beaters, and jorts Can't hide every single Coot feather.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 10:18 PM
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Since Kiffin has blown off his task, Sarkisian Nick Saban did ask. He's new, so I'll bet He's gonna forget A few things, except for his flask.
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All-In [27366]
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There once was a head coach named Swinney,
Jan 3, 2017, 10:26 PM
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Who resurrected our Tigers like a Genie. He promised us vict'ry, And an Oculus trophy, When he stomps Alabma's midget meanie.
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All-TigerNet [10926]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 11:01 PM
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After taking the bucknuts to the woodshed, Down to Tampa the Tigers will head. Led by a Christian and Big Dex, Hurts is a hurtin' after getting suplexed. The Tide tries to roll, but gets steamrolled instead!
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All-TigerNet [10926]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 3, 2017, 11:22 PM
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The Tigers have what it takes to roll the Tide, As they head to Tampa, and not just for the ride. As Watson continues to complete every pass, Clelan and Big Dex keep putting Hurts on his asss. As midnight draws near, the elephant has died!
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CU Guru [1775]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 1:42 AM
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Our Special Teams, Deer Ol Nicky Will not fall again for your tricky If I had 800 bucks I'd surely climb in my truck Tampa bound instead of moaning, What the fricky!
Read to the tune of "Gloom, despair, and agony on me playing in the background!
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 7:31 AM
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Historical moments are nearing. Though negative spin we keep hearing, Paul Finebaum's BS Will be put to rest When Tiger fans leave Tampa cheering.
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Legend [17800]
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Joined: 9/16/03
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excellent***
Jan 5, 2017, 9:35 AM
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1st Rounder [643]
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Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:26 AM
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Hey coots, you must understand The Tigers are King of the land You're just Tiger chow So go away now And bury your head in the sand!
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1st Rounder [615]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:52 AM
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There must be something in those hills that gives every tiger fan chills may we carry the same down to tampa for the game for we came to bust up on Bama's feelz
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Recruit [85]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 11:44 AM
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Tis true the funs in the winnin as Coach Howard looks down just a grinnin Tigers will dominate Rolled Tide is their fate What a sight Elephant heads just a spinnin
Determined Spirit Tigers do possess The tide will be left in a mess Come Monday Night a hell of a fight On knees Saban will acquiesce
The beginning of the end of the Tide They may run but cannot hide Tide rising with temper as all they remember The night Ole Bama cried
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 6:36 PM
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The Bama bravado is waning, And Clemson momentum is gaining. It comes to a peak In less than a week - Their great, spotless year we'll be staining.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 7:33 PM
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The unjustifiable jeers And egomaniacal leers Are overinflated - The Tide's overrated, Much like Mr. Finebaum's big ears.
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 9:10 PM
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The media's comin' around, Through plenty a huff and a frown - They're gonna admit Clemson is legit When we wear the champion's crown.
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Legend [16395]
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Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 9:24 PM
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I just heard a Coot say, "Roll Tide!" Then, grinning a little, I sighed. I told him an earful: "You better be keerful - I don't like Big Macs overfried."
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:12 PM
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Old Nicky's a creature most vile Who spews anger, hatred, and bile That evil old elf Sold his soul to his self And now that old devil can't smile.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:19 PM
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Old Nick's got his head up his butt And he thinks Clemson's stuck in a rut But it won't take us long To show him he's wrong When we punch bama right in the gut
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:24 PM
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Hey, even I'm sick of these limericks by now. But what else am I going to do to pass time while I wait for the game, work? As if I could concentrate enough for that!
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CU Guru [1775]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:31 PM
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Superman is coming, ain't nothin' new-to-us Media begging, Nick don't be so rude-to-us Big Ben brings the pain Here comes the Wayne Train Christian gonna smile and squeeze yo Lugubrious
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 10:46 PM
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There's more to the Tigers than heart, Although that's a critical part. We're loaded with talents, Good coaching, and balance - The Tide will get beat from the start.
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1st Rounder [643]
TigerPulse: 98%
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 4, 2017, 11:20 PM
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Not a Limerick, but here goes:
Stomp 'em, smash 'em, Beat 'em, thrash 'em, Bama's crashin' In grand fashion!
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110%er [5123]
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You can rest now...***
Jan 4, 2017, 11:26 PM
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1st Rounder [643]
TigerPulse: 98%
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Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: You can rest now...***
Jan 4, 2017, 11:32 PM
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Ha ha, yeah I know it's beyond obnoxious at this point. Sorry. I'll stop as soon as bdrechs does.
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Legend [16395]
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Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: You can rest now...***
Jan 5, 2017, 1:41 AM
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Hey I'll go til game day, brotha. I'd have my usual pregame poetry thread going anyway if not for this one, so I'm gonna keep at it. Job ain't done til it gets done right, y'know?
GO TIGERS. BEAT BAMA.
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Legend [16395]
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Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: You can rest now...***
Jan 5, 2017, 1:41 AM
[ in reply to Re: You can rest now...*** ] |
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Hey I'll go til game day, brotha. I'd have my usual pregame poetry thread going anyway if not for this one, so I'm gonna keep at it. Job ain't done til it gets done right, y'know?
GO TIGERS. BEAT BAMA.
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1st Rounder [643]
TigerPulse: 98%
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Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: You can rest now...***
Jan 5, 2017, 9:25 AM
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Yours are the best so keep them coming. I think I'm all rhymed out now, so get ready for the Haiku!
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Legend [16777]
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For some reason Andrew Dice Clay poped into my mind when
Jan 4, 2017, 11:36 PM
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I read this. Little boy blue and the like.
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Associate AD [807]
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Joined: 7/29/03
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By the 3rd quarter Sark will look like he's been hit by a car
Jan 5, 2017, 6:50 AM
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All the pundits will declare Watson a Star Sark will be passed out in the booth With soiled pants and missing a tooth Amidst an empty bottle of gin and cooler of PBR
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Legend [16395]
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Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 5, 2017, 7:32 AM
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Big whoop - Wilkins checked a guy's oil. For all of the whining and toil, Let's please not lose sight Of late Monday night When Tigers the Tide's hopes will spoil.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Posts: 827
Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 5, 2017, 9:35 AM
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I'm sick of these limerick rhymes Especially since half of the time Despite slamming 'Bammer The syntax and grammar Are less of a poem than a crime!
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Legend [17800]
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lol***
Jan 5, 2017, 9:40 AM
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1st Rounder [643]
TigerPulse: 98%
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Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 5, 2017, 10:59 AM
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This fondling story is bunk But we'll keep hands off bama's junk This time instead We'll grab Jalen's head And cram it up Fitzpatrick's trunk!
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 5, 2017, 3:06 PM
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That angry Napoleon Nicky Is gonna find out that it's tricky To implement checks On Wilkins and Dex When Jalen misfires for a picky.
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Legend [16395]
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Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 5, 2017, 9:57 PM
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Oh Bama, you silly ol' thing, You think that the world's on your string. You can't yet imagine The absolute thrashin' Our D line is going to bring.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Posts: 827
Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 6, 2017, 8:44 AM
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The average 'bama I.Q. We'll outscore, it ain't hard to do It's easy, you see, A field goal for three Or even a safety will do!
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Commissioner [907]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 6, 2017, 9:54 AM
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Bama's head coach that is a runt In the 4th quarter will start to hunt For someone to blame for the loss of the game And Kiffin will take the brunt
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Legend [16395]
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Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 7, 2017, 9:41 AM
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While Tigertown bears through a freezin', Our boys can enjoy some warm breezin'. They're hunkerin' down With eyes on the crown, Which, Monday, from Bama they're seizin'.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Posts: 827
Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 7, 2017, 10:23 AM
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While 'bama fans aren't that well bred They're certainly very well fed And after the beat down That's comin' in Tamp'town The Tigers they'll very well dread!
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Commissioner [963]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 7, 2017, 10:37 AM
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Sittin on the toilet Takin a poop Waiting for our tigers To get in the groove Come Monday night Prime time game Bama facin the Tigers And we can't be tamed.
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Commissioner [963]
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Joined: 12/14/11
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 7, 2017, 9:30 PM
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Sittin over yonder drinkin a beer Watchin the tide wipe their tears Deshaun runnin for another first down They can't stop nothing Their defense isn't sound We laughing we smilin bc they look distraught What happened to that defense They just got got.
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Legend [16395]
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Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 7, 2017, 1:26 PM
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You won't find a general better; A leader right down to the letter. Deshaun's never addled When his cage is rattled. The Tide won't escape their or'nge fetter.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 7, 2017, 3:30 PM
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Mike Williams will not be denied Like when he gave that coot a ride Consid'ring his powers I'm glad he is ours 'Cause soon he'll be torching the tide!
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Legend [16395]
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 8, 2017, 3:16 PM
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We're nearing the Elephant Maiming - The Great Tuscaloosa Defaming! We do what we wanna - These Tigers are gonna Engage in some Crimson Tide taming.
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1st Rounder [643]
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Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 8, 2017, 8:49 PM
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The crimson tides' flaws will be laid bare They're going to be needing some healthcare At home in their beds They'll be holding their heads While Clemson is holding the hardware!
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Legend [16395]
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Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 9, 2017, 5:13 PM
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The cogs of the Tiger machine, The likes of which Bama's not seen, Are coming to life! They'll crush, chew, and knife The Elephants to smithereens!
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Legend [16395]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 9, 2017, 5:32 PM
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The kings will be promptly deposed; Their weaknesses will be exposed. Come midnight in Tampa, There'll be a new champ-a - The Tiger's wrath soundly imposed!
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Legend [16395]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 10, 2017, 2:09 AM
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For all the poetic largesse And punditry's conjured distress, The Tigers were steady - At every turn, ready To prove to the world they're the best.
CHAMPS. GO TIGERS.
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1st Rounder [643]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 827
Joined: 12/7/15
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 10, 2017, 2:53 AM
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The tigers are champs undisputed We beat many teams well reputed Achieving the dream Of number one team Our primacy can't be refuted
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Legend [16395]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 9560
Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: Limerick time
Jan 10, 2017, 7:22 AM
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This team, through its grit and severity, Took 4th quarter points like a charity! They withstood the Tide, Their guts, skill, and pride Have bought them great honor and rarity!
GO TIGERS.
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